Tuesday, March 31, 2009

My Ocean...

I couldn't tear myself away.

My feet became addicted to the sand caving from under them after a false sense of stability was given.

My hair adapted to the wind that blew it every which direction, making me feel so at home.

My eyes couldn't part from the unpredictable rythym of the ocean waves, the unharmonized beat that resounded in my ears, the beautiful randomness that doesn't falter far from the sounds of jazz.

My soul has become attached to to the overwhelming feeling I encounter every time I am next to such beauty...

The water hitting my feet
Traveling through my soul
Swelling up into my eyes...
As crying is the only reaction I have to such a perfect view.

I couldn't bare to walk away, even to express my emotions through this pen.

I want to touch.
I want to hold it within.

Nothing matters here...
pain, failure, heartache.

Just as the sand rinses off my feet, these emotions tagged with all confusion.....

dissappear.

I want to find myself here.
As the sand caves from under my feet,
I realize my stability in life resembles that false sense of security.
Our unpredictable lives are unreliable,
and the beauty in that fact-
that in one second our feet could easily be put on new ground,
slams me into the reality that life
unknown.
undecided.
Is the most stable life chosen.


When my feet touch the thing so collosial.
So fierce and so beautiful,
I will know.

because when my feet touch this ocean, I feel COMPLETE.
Despite it's scariness, despite it's unpredictable ways.
It is what I crave for my life, in all aspects.

No pond
No river
No lake
will suffice.

My ocean will come.

The empowerment along with the humility I feel as I walk closer and closer to these waves is a constant reminder of this.

I can't tear away.
It calls me in.
I refuse to tear away.

2 comments:

  1. Love the description of sand under your feet.

    ReplyDelete